Step away from the Prius!!!

The trip down was relatively uneventful. Being Friday the 13th, I was just sure that some horrific event was going to befall us. Scenes from The Hills Have Eyes ran through my head, so when we made it all the way to Phoenix without becoming the playthings of toothless hill-folk, I was pretty excited. We visited with Travis' grandma in from Hawaii and his dad for a bit, then decided we'd go check into the hotel, wash the stench of the road off of ourselves, pick my mother in law up from the airport, and come back for a relaxing dinner with the family. Ah, but no.

One block away from my in-laws' apartment, some STUPID illegal immigrant BITCH decided that in the good old US, traffic lights are mere suggestions rather than actual laws you should obey (kind of like the immigration laws she so brazenly disregarded when she hopped the fence) and ran a red light, smashing into the car in front of us, ricocheted off of that car, glanced off the front of our little Prius, removing that pesky license plate and several coats of paint, not to mention a big chunk of our bumper and KEPT RIGHT ON DRIVING, until her car, so completely jacked up by her inability to decipher the complicated color codes that are traffic lights, died in the middle of the road.

Now there are several things about this episode that piss me off. Here are the top 5:

1. That this woman, who shouldn't even be here in the first place, did some thing so freakin' stupid with her TWO CHILDREN in the car!! One MAYBE 2 years old and the other one 4ish months old.

2. That this same illegal never once hit her brakes, not even after hitting the car in front of us.

3. That, though she could afford an Infinity SUV, the gas to drive this SUV, but CLEARLY couldn't be bothered to pay for car insurance.

4. That she was cited for having no license, no insurance (total shocker, I know), and running a red light and then allowed to go about her merry way despite the fact that I overheard one of the cops telling another cop that she has a record for doing shit like this and did I mention that SHE'S FREAKIN' ILLEGAL!!!

5. This is the third time this poor Prius has been dented up since we bought it one year ago, and the second time it's been messed up by a damned ILLEGAL!!

6. That everyone was trying to be cool, even though this was her FREAKING FAULT and asking her if she and her kids were okay, and she never once asked if anyone in the two cars she hit was okay. And the claim that she doesn’t speak English doesn’t really hold water since she understood everyone asking her if SHE was okay, and her ability to understand English suddenly vanished once the 5-0 showed up.

Okay, that's 6 things, but really, that last one was just insult to injury. Now, I know it doesn't seem to be a very popular opinion to say that illegal immigrants shouldn't be here, but come on. They SHOULDN'T BE HERE!!! Particularly when they're breaking the damned laws. And I'm not just assuming that this woman wasn't a citizen because she was Mexican. I saw her Mexican ID card. And they weren't just visiting because her husband was on his way home from his job at Sherwin Williams.

Travis and I have come to the conclusion that if you're illegal and you're caught breaking a law (besides the one you broke when you snuck into the country in the first place), you should be immediately deported, regardless of how minor the law you broke is. HOWEVER, if you're the victim of a crime and you're illegal, we'll go ahead and give you a pass and not deport you when you call the police. I don't want anyone getting beaten up or anything and being afraid to report the asshole that did it to them.

I just get so freakin' irritated when people make excuses for illegal immigrants. Here are the top 5 I hate and my rebuttals:

1. They're just trying to make a better life for themselves. Fair enough. However, if you spent half as much time improving your own country as you've spent trying to sneak into ours, your life would probably get better just because of that AND you'd have the added bonus of knowing that millions of other people will have a better life because of your contribution.

2. They're taking the jobs that Americans won't do. No, they're taking the jobs that employers don't want to PAY an American to do. Why would you pay minimum wage when you can get an illegal immigrant to do it for $2.00 an hour cheaper. Plus I'm sure there are millions of homeless people who would LOVE to have a job so they can get themselves a home. Furthermore, that’s not only insulting to the unemployed Americans, but also to the immigrant who is getting the shaft in their paycheck.

3. Their country is so corrupt that they have to get out to make a better life for themselves. Last time I checked, the folks that jumped off the boat from their various countries of origin didn't walk right into a perfect way of life when they hit good old Plymouth Rock. They forged one out of nothing to create a fair government that everyone could live with, and the freedom to pipe up if you didn't think something was so fair. PS With 12 MILLION illegals in America today, you're telling me you can't put something together to overthow the government that you claim is holding you down?! We’ll help you! That’s our main thing these days: helping the underdog and getting crucified for it.

4. We don't have the resources to round up all the illegal immigrants who are already here. Again, that's a valid argument. But my bitch is when the illegal immigrants fall right into the laps of the authorities, like the idiot bitch who ran the red light. There's no need to round her up. She's right there. Hell, load her up and I'll drive her fat ass back to Mexico myself.

5. We don't have the resources to keep illegal immigrants out. My wonderful husband came up with a great solution to this problem: if you're caught in this country illegally (based on the Zero Tolerance for Illegals Breaking the Law Program outlined above), then before we ship you back, you are required to help build 10 feet of fence between the Mexican-American border and/or the Canadian-American border before we toss you out on your asses. If you're caught illegally in the country a second time, then your amount of fence triples.

Okay, now that I've gotten that off my chest, here is the list of things that made the fact that I now have to pay my deductible to fix a problem I didn't cause completely worth it:

1. Seeing Travis' grandma hug him like she hadn't seen him in 15 years

2. Watching my father in law walk across the podium and accept his Masters of Secondary Education Degree and the subsequent walk back to his seat reminiscent of Rocky jumping at the top of The Philadelphia Museum of Art stairs.

3. Wrestling in the living room with Travis' niece and nephews

4. Watching Travis' 2 year old nephew hug his Great-Grandma and giving his Auntie Taya a kiss for some gum

5. Spending time with Travis' sister Taya in from Alaska and his grandma in from Hawaii

6. Getting a picture of Travis' dad with all of his kids

7. Seeing my mother-and-father-in-law greet each other with a huge hug and a big sloppy kiss (that actually made Travis turn a little green and throw up a little in his mouth) after spending a month apart while my father-in-law finished up his degree.

8. After 3 months of looking for furniture, we found some after 5 minutes in the Lane Furniture store in Phoenix